Someone Pissed in the Gene Pool Again

I'm driving into work this morning and there is this Good Ole Boy in a big ass pickup truck behind me. He comes flying up behind me, dippin his tabacky, and I get over to let him pass. As I do, I notice a crudely hand-made window sticker. This guy "lovingly" cut out each of the following letters: "Eatin' Pussy... Shittin' Food."

I almost wrecked when I read it. It caught me so off guard! But all I could think of was - THANK GOD I'M MARRIED! I couldn't even imagine being single and having this as an option to date. What a piece of cacka. A derelict hillbilly white-trash piece of garbage, if you will. And wouldn't he be a treat to bring home to Mom??

I mean, don't get me wrong, I enjoy "Blue Collar Comedy" and I think "Larry the Cable Guy" is hillarious. But I don't see him as dating material. This is for several reasons, the first and most important being that I'm married and not looking to date.

Anyway, I just thought this material was too good to go unrepeated. Only in America. And only in Ohio, I guess...