Target is my mistress
Oh, sweet Tar-jay. How I do love that store!
For my birthday, I racked up $210.00 worth of gift cards. AWESOME! Thank you to all of my friends for knowing me oh-so-well!
Now, for most people, this amount would cover several trips to Target. For Lo Lo, it was one trip.
For most people, they would not need to put in any of their own money. For Lo Lo, she spent an extra $100+
Yes, my friends, Target has lured me into her web, like a siren in the dark sea of night. I have written her a poem:
She called out to me, and I came running.
"I LOVE YOU" I screamed.
She did not reply.
My cart overflows in hopes of pleasing her.
Oh, unrequited love...
How you tease me.
But alas, I fall under you spell.
You bitch!
Yes, Lo Lo has a problem. And ironically, my only cure is more Target. I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more Target.
But don't fear the Reaper....
posted by Lo Lo Lova @ 5:22 AM
23 Comments:
But Target has EVERYTHING! And if my husband is going to carry on an affair with Home Depot, he can't be surprised when I develop my own outside attachments.
I'm right there with you, LoLo. My only complaint is the ladies' fashions seem to be geared toward a younger, less curvaceous figure than the Ubermilf's. Ubermilf's got back.
I agree with you about the ladies' fashions. I, too, got back. In fact, I have a lot of junk in the trunk. I would never wear a belly shirt with low-rise jeans. I wouldn't want to cause anyone to projectile vomit.
Target RULES!!
there needs to be a support group for those addicted to tar-jay...like myself. maybe we can hold meetings at the sacred ground under the beckoning red circle!
Let's start a group! What shall we call ourselves??
A support group would suggest we want to stop what we're doing. I don't think we do.
But if we did, how 'bout Target Tarts?
How about Target Tarts: For the love of Target!
I'm in. We could all get a bulls-eye tattooed on our asses.
That is outstanding! I'm bending over in anticipation!!
Beach Bum: Dare I asked where you would like the tattoo placed??
I have stumbled into a dark and scary place...
please don't make me get a tattoo...
Nick, don't be silly. We use a branding iron on men.
Face it, Nick - whether a branding iron or a tattoo, you are getting permanently marked, buddy!
Maybe we could use a Sharpie then?
Pretty please.
I think Target Tards.
YES!!
Okay Nick, I was going to let you use the Sharpie, but since you agreed with John's nasty comment, you must be branded. Ubermilf, the branding iron, please! Nick, John, GET IN LINE AND BEND OVER!!
Baby Got Back and an attitude, girlfriend! What is this weird cult I have happened upon? what is Target and why does it get you all so wet?
Captain Beefheart: Welcome Aboard!
Please tell me you are kidding about Target. It is only the greatest store in the world! And they have a big red bulls-eye on their signage. And it's not just a store for chicks with back. No, they have tools, sporting goods, toys, food, outdoor supplies, etc. It's a discounted department store and so much more. You must go to target.com and find the location nearest you and RUN, don't walk, there. You will love it. LOVE IT.
Glad you like the attitude and the backitude. There's lots more where that came from!
They don't sell alcohol, which is a pet peeve of mine. Otherwise, Target is ACE!
I thought ACE was the place with the helpful hardware store man?
Backitude - LOL! I fear my nearest Target store is about 4000 miles east of here, as I currently live on a small damp grey island off the north west coast of Europe. Denied :o(
You can always shop on-line, my friend. I'm sure they can make a drop over your island from a helicopter or puddle-jumper.
Glad you like my backitude. Trust me, there's enough of it for everyone :)
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