Big Mistake. HUGE

So this past weekend, I got my mane cut. Whilst in the chair, my hairdresser made a comment about all the grey. Now, I’ve been getting these, coarse, long, white hairs since I was 16. It’s all stress-related.

Anyway, I asked what I could do that did not involve me coming to see her every month and dropping $100+. She suggested L'Oreal temporary dye in medium brown. No highlights, no red, no caramel. Just brown, like my natural hair color. But not permanent.

Okay, so I went out and bought it. And last night, I decided to go for it. The first step in this ridiculously long process was to wet my hair, then I had to block my hair into 4 different sections, then I had put on the gloves (which had some sort of powdery substance on them that made my hands itch), and then I had to had to mix the shit up - oh my God the smell! - and apply it to my head.

So I applied the stinky stuff to my noggin, which took forever, and then had to let it sit for 15 mins and then rinse, and then I had to put on this conditioner, and then rinse again.

After my final rinse, my tub and sink were stained, as was my towel. And the odor was absolutely revolting. REVOLTING. RE-phucking-VOLTING.

Also, the "medium brown” looks black and very flat. I hate it! And on top of everything else, my scalp started burning after the dual rinse cycle.

Sooooo.... I tried to wash it out immediately. Twice. Then I came downstairs and hubby was like "oh man, that is pretty stron." So I washed again.

I actually woke up in the middle of the night because of the smell. It was so STRONG and so GROSS.

So this morning, I washed it twice more and put lots of jelly goop and hairspray and perfume in my hair. But I can still smell it.

OH THE HUMANITY!!! Dear God, the humanity!

Needless to say, this is my first AND LAST attempt at home coloring. From now on, I’ll just say – phuck it – and be the 30-something chick with the full grey head of hair.

THAT’S HOT!!!